Business Briefs

Leftover “Clap On!” Motors Discovered in Heart Pacemakers

The consumer watchdog group Consumer Watchdog issued a warning this week against purchasing heart pacemakers made by Tapson-Wise of Milwaukee. Rather than being equipped with...

The Workplace

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Company Mandates That Employees Spend 12 Minutes a Day at Water Cooler

When employees of Milwaukee's Turner-Marx failed to gather around the new water cooler, which had been purchased solely to facilitate conversation and encourage camaraderie,...

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With Clients Avoiding Each Other, Realtor Offers Shared Workspace for One

Shared workspace provider Jam’D was losing thousands of clients last summer, due to people not wanting to get within six feet of each other. Faced with the expense of maintaining 3400 workspace facilities averaging 16,000 square feet apiece, the company was within days of going under.  Then founder and CEO...

Company’s Stock Falls as CEO Photographed Wearing Only One Hat

The stock price of Fresno, California-based Melipropinol2 fell 45 percent after photos of CEO Marlene Timrod, wearing only one hat, were posted across social media yesterday. “A company is doomed to fail if its CEO doesn't wear many hats," she told Corporiffic in 2017.  "I've worn at least five for...

Norton Utilities Save Universe From Annihilation

A number of media outlets are reporting that the Universe nearly came to an abrupt end on July 10. It was saved at the last minute by the quick thinking of Juanita Ramirez, a saleswoman for Real Estate 12 in Queens, New York. At 9 that morning Ramirez discovered that her computer had...

Milwaukee Firm Has Been Waiting for Other Shoe to Drop Since 1990

When the first shoe dropped at Milwaukee-based Glenning Preservatives, back on August 1, 1990, the staff began the customary wait for the other one to follow suit.   Thirty years later, it still hasn’t. The company recently marked this milestone anniversary with a low-key reception in the cafeteria: Free pop and cake...

More Michigan Municipalities Looking to Fill Town Drunk Positions

There are 31 municipalities looking to fill the position of Town Drunk, up from 22 just a year ago. "Many of them are moving onto other jobs," says Jill Timrod of the Ballter Institute, "mainly in government, though mechanical engineering is claiming quite a few." Ironically, the shortage is coming at...

Loiterers Leaving the Profession as Declining In-Store Sales Impact Routines

As brick and mortar retail sales continue to fall – due mainly to the increase in online ordering that began long before the pandemic – opportunities for loiterers have been shrinking as well. “It used to be you could count on a 40, even a 50 hour week,” says   ...

Analyst Mixes Up Career “Do” With “Don’t,” Punches CEO in Nose

Having read 787 business advice books, Sarah Watney, an ultra-analyst at Chicago’s Millington Group, believed she had memorized every "do" and "don't" necessary to advance her career.  Last March 16, as she stood at the complimentary espresso machine chatting with colleagues, CEO Mike Harderman walked past and nodded at...

Midtown Eatery Has Customers Arrested for Violating its Salad Bar Policy

SevenTwoTwoTwoThreeTwo – the swanky new Midtown eatery featuring Missouri River cuisine – has become the first Detroit restaurant to prosecute patrons who help themselves to the salad bar when they’re not entitled to it. “For years restaurants have looked the other say,” says owner Paulie Patterson. “Somebody needed to take...
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Walkin’ in the CEO’s Shoes

An Alternative Strategist puts himself in the CEO’s shoes by actually sneaking them out of his office and walking a mile in them.

The Businesstype Series: #113, the Plop & Stayer

The Plop & Stayer will unexpectedly plop down in the chair in front of your desk - and then just stay. If it's being done correctly, he or she will time the incident so it occurs at the least convenient time - like when you're practicing for a spontaneous...

Police Shut Down Fight Ring Involving Civil Engineers

Over 40 people were arrested in Wyandotte, Michigan last Saturday in connection with a fight operation pitting two civil engineers against each other. According to city police spokeswoman Celia Minsle, officers were called to a home on Biddle St., by a neighbor disturbed by the noise of cheering spectators and...

Over 100,000 Notary Publics Living in Shelters, Waiting for Adoption

With increased downsizing and more online options – and now the pandemic – US businesses don’t require the services of notary publics like they once did. Unable to find work, over 100,000 of them have been forced to move into a notary shelter      “It’s a desperate situation,” says...