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Systems Verifier Types Same Sentence 16 Million Times to Look Busy

William Harris, a systems verifier at Cleveland's Palmerton-Inge, was dismissed this week when it was discovered he had done no work since being hired...

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Whether You’re Gluten Free and Other Things Former Employers Can and Can’t Reveal

Whether you leave a job on your own or against your will, it’s likely that a potential new employer will contact your former company to get some information about you. “Too many people think a company can say what it wants,” says Dr. Ramona Collins of the Kansinton Institute. “In...

NEW RESTAURANT: Crispist Isn’t All About Crackers, Just Mostly

Just opened in Northwest Midtown by Chef au Contraire Sylvia Waterson, Crispist is not Detroit’s first cracker-based eatery - but it's the only one combining both top shelf and top drawer crackers with the farm-to-another-farm-to-table concept that started in Decatur, Illinois last January. “The crackers are simply the starting point...

Weekly Quiz: Which is NOT a Sanctioned Fruit Cliche?

Which of these is NOT an officially sanctioned fruit-based business cliché, according to the National Institute for Sanctioning and Prioritizing Generally Accepted Business Cliches? a) Comparing apples to oranges b) Picking the low-hanging fruit c) Can’t see the kumquat for the seed d) Turning lemons into lemonade Submit your answer here. All correct answers received...

World Beats Path to Mousetrap Factory Door

Fifteen people were injured on Tuesday when billions of people from around the world beat a path to the door of the Newton Mousetrap Works in Fenton, Michigan. Newton had updated its web page an hour earlier to promote its "better mousetrap" – a laser-activated device that emits a high-frequency...
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New Big Box Retailer to Sell Big Boxes

Sources say a new “Big Box” retailer may be opening soon near downtown Detroit. Cubicle F’s Steve Baeckelandt reports.
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Practicing How to Look Serious Enough to be Promoted

A serious expression is imperative to appearing busy and valuable, and to being taken seriously. Non-seriousness implies a lack of concern, an absence of worrying, and a false sense of job security.
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Four WorkPlace Stories

Highlights of recent videos on getting promoted, a new kind of training, mistaken identity, and mandatory socializing. Watch complete episodes in "The WorkPlace" - - Taking the Job Anyhow, Canine Loyalty Training, The Boss Thinks I'm Not Me, and Spontaneous Happy Hour.

New Guidelines Would Require Corporate Whistle Blowers to Blow an Actual Whistle

The American Association of Monetary Trasparency has proposed a new rule requiring that employees of financial institutions blow an actual whistle when reporting potential malfeasance. “Many of the businesses we represent have complained that the current process is too anonymous,” says council president Gina Kasminski. “They say they have no...

Walking Insurance Actuarials Invade Pennsylvania City

Three weeks ago, insurance actuarial Anita Mizon, who had died in 2015 of digestive issues, emerged from her grave and began wandering, disheveled and blank-eyed, through Altmoor, Pennsylvania. “At first nobody thought much of it,” says resident Sally Hilford. “Ever since the pandemic, nothing really surprises you.” Within two days, however,...

Does Starting a Fan Club for My Boss Make Me Look Like a Suck-Up?

Q) As I understand the concept of “Fan Clubs,” people start them for those they admire a lot –  singers like Patti Page, or comedians like Shecky Greene. Bearing this concept in mind, and since I greatly admire my boss, who rose from the ranks of Accounting Coordinator Level...

Effective November 1, “The Man” Will be a Woman from Alabama

In just over a month when you “stick it to The Man,” you’ll be sticking it to a woman. Marilyn Middleton, a 32-year old Mobile, Alabama stockbroker, was appointed to be The Man last week following the unexpected retirement of Californian Harold Thompson Rattner, who’d served in the position since...

Average Retirement Savings Just $213; Here’s How to Save $45 More

According to financial advisor Sandra Spalding of Cleveland's Spalding/Pitts, the average American businessperson verging on retirement has amassed a savings of just $213. “Assuming one lives 25 years into retirement that's just $8.52 per year,” she says. “Even if one closely watches expenses, it's probably not going to be enough.” Spalding...