While being a “team player” and “consensus builder,” is essential, just as vital to success is having enemies – at least according to one of the USA’s most listened-to business conceptualizers.
“A person who has no enemies,” says Morton Cornacki of the Breddow Insistute, “is a person who has too many friends.”
He says that prospective employers look favorably on the existence of at least five enemies, and will likely ask how many you have in each of the following categories:
- Natural Enemy. This is someone who has cut you off in a meeting at least five times – or who stole your man or woman, or scratched your car door with a shopping cart. You could theoretically have lunch or attend a brainstorming session with a natural enemy, but would probably not exchange holiday gifts.
- Sworn Enemy. This relationship is more strained, and is usually marked by dirty looks and sneers when passing in the hallway. Something of significance needs to have happened: Questioning your prioritizing guidelines to the boss, for instance, or calling you “the fattest accountant on record.” To have a sworn enemy, you must actually swear that the person is your enemy – and this requires getting the appropriate affidavit signed and notarized.
- Mortal Enemy. A mortal enemy is not a good enemy. Something very sinister is usually involved: His or her questioning whether you are truly working 24/7 or giving 110%, or breaking into your house and turning off your alarm clock. There is also much more paperwork.
- Arch Enemy. This is the worst of all possible enemies, like Lex Luther is to Superman or the gekko is the pouch crab. Your arch enemy is someone who would have you killed – or who you would have killed – provided this could be accomplished without negatively impacting your inclusion in task force assignments. The good news: You can’t have more than one arch enemy – and if you have one, most companies don’t expect you to have any in the lesser categories.
