Gena McPherson, who had been the PR and communications manager at Minneapolis-based Calfalex for 12 years, was relieved of her duties last week due to a glaring omission in a company press release.
When announcing Calfalex’s new employee benefits package, she failed to use the word “robust” – which has been utilized in 99.22 percent of all US press releases over the past year.
“That someone in her position could issue such a missive that doesn’t contain the word at least once is simply unthinkable in this day and age,” says Clarence Bevington, CEO of the penisculum manufacturer. “People expect to see it, and if they don’t it becomes an immediate red flag.”
In the week since the release was issued, Cafalex stock has declined by 45 percent, and according to one expert the company has some serious explaining to do.
“Shareholders are obviously alarmed,” says Dr. Monica Stallings of the Rivard Institute, which monitors and ranks business word usage. “And so are the employees, who are undoubtedly wondering if their next appendectomy is going to wipe out their savings.”
Stallings says that the importance and length of the benefits release called for the word being used at least three times. “And I honestly believe four would not have been too many.”
While Calfalex says it plans to re-release the release next week, Stallings cautions against using “robust” six times to make up for the three not used in the last one.
“They’ll be even worse off,” she says, “because the extra three will cancel out the first three.”
